Archive for the 'Hazards' Category

The Lost City of Hotlanta?

Some of you may have heard of the worst drought in 100 years happening in the S.E. United States. A lot people these days know all about peak oil production, but I remember hearing a few cries in the wilderness claiming we would reach peak water production long before peak oil. Does this drought signify more than we think?

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Urban Scout Discovers Cure For Cancer!

I don’t see any other gentle way of saying this; I have cancer. Don’t freak out now, it won’t kill me. I found out a while ago, but haven’t said anything because I wanted to learn more about it before sharing something this personal with the world. They call it, “basal cell carcinoma.” It refers to a superficial, slow-growing skin cancer. Since it happens to live in the crook of my nostril I don’t feel so scared about it (aside from the horrific Michael Jackson fantasies).

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Whiskey in the Yarrow!

Okay, not whiskey, Vodka (but whiskey would have worked too). Penny and I went fishing this week at one of her stomping grounds. Unfortunately we found the biting flies out in full swing. But to my luck, the ever-wise and herbally-prepared Penny had a quick fix; yarrow tincture bug repellent. She even had it in a nifty (although non-primitive) spray-bottle!

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Giardia: Eat Shit and Die…

If you’ve traveled to another country or gone anywhere in the outdoors, you’ve probably heard of giardia. Supposedly Civilizations settlers brought this crap over from Europe or somewhere, since giardia seems to foster best in densely populated areas of domestic cows. Thanks to these assholes (the settlers, not the cows) this flagellated protozoan parasite known as Giardia lamblia, (AKA “the runs,” “the shits,” and my favorite; “Beaver Fever“), lives in almost every water source in the United States. It generally spreads by tricking someone into eating the poop of another infected creature… which leads me to think that giardia sounds like Mother Nature telling civilization to, and not in the figurative sense, “eat shit and die.”

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Nosferatus Need Nixtamal

I love chips. Anyone who knows me, knows I have an insatiable hunger for them. I can eat a whole bag without blinking an eye. Of course, afterwards I feel like crap but that has never seemed to stop me. On my current diet, I am only aloud to eat blue corn. Last week I ate two whole bags of blue corn chips. Immediately my dandruff, a symptom of candidiasis, returned. Most of the food I eat is unprocessed. I decided that if I should continue to eat blue corn chips, I should have to make them myself.

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Toxic Algae

Late last summer I ran a post-apocalyptic skills summer camp. We traveled to Laurelhurst Park for Calens grappling hook climbing lesson. Calen began his lesson at the west end of the park. Having a shoulder injury I could not partake in the climbing so I began to wander the park in search of food. When I reached the pond I saw that it was almost glowing neon green in color. It looked radioactive. Around the pond was a strip of yellow caution tape and posted every so often were signs that read, “TOXIC ALGAE BLOOM: Microcystis. Please keep away from water.” I thought, isn’t it odd for a pond in a city park to have a toxic algae bloom? Apparently it isn’t as rare as I thought.

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Poison

I’ve spent the last couple of days browsing the internet for information on poison. Sasha is very concerned that I don’t poison myself when I eat such meats as raccoons. Dioxins love to stick to fat and so they travel quickly up the food chain. It’s not difficult to see the chain here. High levels of dioxin have been found in the sediment of the Willamette River, which separates Portland into two halves, East and West. Living down there are crayfish who get eaten by raccoons (among others). Since raccoons are fatty creatures, most likely urban raccoons will be full of dioxin.

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